Architecture personal statement (1)

Reading time: 2 minutes
Price: Free download
Published: 13th September 2019
Word count: 523 words
File format: Text

Design is a fundamental part of our environment. My desire to study Architecture builds on my keen interest in our built environment and interconnected world. Using innovative design, we have the unique ability to influence our quality of life, by improving current wellbeing and shaping the atmosphere for future generations. Living in London, I have been constantly surrounded by a multiplicity of buildings and design movements, where controversial brutalist structures can be situated next to those with neo-classical constructs. I have always been interested in how we can contemplate an idea and develop it from a concept into a physical representation.

In particular, use of design to solve problems interests me, as the topic is unbounded. By studying A Level Geography, current environmental issues such as rapid population growth and the scarcity of space and resources prompted me to be more aware of my surroundings. It encompasses aspects such as globalisation, our restless earth and population changes, all of which intrigue me. In furthering my geographical knowledge, I will be able to use design to tackle imminent problems such as overpopulation and global warming. To me, there is an immediate necessity to modify the architectural processes in order to provide a more sustainable environment. Following my reading of Light in Japanese Architecture by Henry Plummer, which explained how natural light can be used to improve comfort, I have looked for alternative ways to approach design. This book also enlightened me to the design of Japanese Jutaku Houses, which respond to crowded cities by turning necessity into assets and strive to design unorthodox houses and in the process, redefining rules of design.

This year, I have decided to use my Design Technology A Level to respond to spatial problems at my school, by designing a pavilion for the Art Department.

Along with my interests in the environment, I attend History of Art Society in my school, and have been selected as the editor of ARTicle, an annual art history journal, which has been sponsored by the Dulwich Picture Gallery, and who I am working with as part of their youth team.

As part of the society, I presented on Rodchenko: A Photographic Revolution, where I expressed my fascination in how photography became a way to represent societal constructs, not just a depiction of reality which lead into a debate on place representation in art.

(Work placement with TP Bennett)
This year, I undertook work experience at TP Bennett, which helped me to comprehend the complexities of the profession. The knowledge I gained working with interior designers, architects, engineers, and touring a site

My interest on the subject was formed fully after attending a lecture by Alex de Rijke, where his passion for the subject really fascinated me. His creativity in all aspects of design was

By embarking on an Architectural degree, I hope to gain invaluable skills in complex design and positively contribute to the world. The possibility that I could make a difference and contribute to the world in a physical and permanent sense has always piqued my interest in architecture, and I am excited by the prospect of fulfilling my design needs.

30.11.2017

Why this example works — strengths and ways to improve

Your draft has promising raw material: Plummer's book, a Design Technology pavilion, editing ARTicle, a Rodchenko talk and a TP Bennett placement. However, several paragraphs are unfinished, and the strongest experiences are listed rather than explored. The opening and closing rely on broad claims, so your personal reasoning about architecture is harder to see than your activities.

Subject motivation

controversial brutalist structures can be situated next to those with neo-classical constructs

This London observation is your most personal motivation, but it stops at contrast. Naming a specific street or building and saying what you noticed about scale, material or use would turn general interest into genuine curiosity. Lines such as 'Design is a fundamental part of our environment' add little.

Academic preparation

use my Design Technology A Level to respond to spatial problems at my school

The pavilion is excellent evidence because it involves a real client, site and constraints. It currently fills one sentence. Explaining the spatial problem, your design decisions and what testing or drawing taught you would show preparation far more convincingly than the Geography topic list.

Evidence and reflection

explained how natural light can be used to improve comfort

Your reading of Plummer is a good start, and the Jutaku reference shows initiative. You say you 'looked for alternative ways to approach design' but never show one. Linking the reading to your pavilion or to a space you know would make it reflection rather than summary.

Relevant experience

helped me to comprehend the complexities of the profession

The TP Bennett placement and the de Rijke lecture are both cut off mid-sentence, so their value is lost. Even when complete, 'complexities of the profession' is generic. Describe one task, conversation or site moment and what it changed in your understanding of architectural practice.

Credibility and voice

I will be able to use design to tackle imminent problems such as overpopulation

Ambitions to solve overpopulation and global warming overstate what an undergraduate can claim, and they weaken your credible, specific material. Your voice is clearest in the Rodchenko talk. A grounded tone that shows how you think would be more persuasive than promises to change the world.

Structure and format

(Work placement with TP Bennett)

Draft labels, a date and incomplete sentences show the statement is still in progress. Several one-sentence paragraphs fragment the flow. Grouping your material into design practice, critical reading and art history, then completing each thought, would create coherence. Also check slips such as 'lead' for 'led' and 'interest on'.

What you’ve done well

Your evidence is varied and relevant. Reading, a design project, editing a journal, presenting and a placement together suggest real engagement with architecture.
The Rodchenko presentation shows you can analyse how images construct meaning, a transferable critical skill for architectural thinking.

How this draft could improve

Finish the TP Bennett and de Rijke paragraphs, each with one concrete detail and what you learned from it.
Expand the pavilion project into a central example: the problem, your approach, and what you would change.
Replace the broad opening and closing claims with a specific observation about a London building and a closing goal that grows from your experiences.

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