Biomedical sciences personal statement (3)

Reading time: 2 minutes
Price: Free download
Published: 13th September 2019
Word count: 548 words
File format: Text

My love for biology and curiosity of the human anatomy are just two of the reasons for choosing to study the human body, in both form and function and how this structure relates to disease. My fascination in science arises from its uncertainty, and the opportunity to study the foundation of life will allow me to enhance my knowledge, understand and answer questions I can’t yet explain about the human body I live in every day

I enjoy challenges, and I am aware of the demands this course entails, however, I am confident in choosing to study biology because major scientific breakthroughs would not be accomplished without the extensive research carried out in this field. In high school, I spent a week shadowing a local GP where I observed doctors working, diagnosing and treating patients with infection and disease, from this work experience I recognised the importance of the research and lab work involved in treating and finding cures to disease. In addition, I have spent a placement week at a primary school where I worked one to one with children to improve literacy and mathematical skills which provided me with valuable insight into different teaching methods and techniques. From these experiences, I developed communication skills, gained the ability to overcome setbacks, work independently as well as gaining experience working within a group of diverse peers which allowed me to improve teamwork, leadership and responsibility skills.

My interest in science can be seen by my A level subjects. Biology has allowed me to gain a brief understanding of the human body from intercellular reactions to complex body systems; I had the opportunity to manage a project while studying ecology which was very interesting as I was able to carry out my research from planning to using statistical tests to analyse my findings. My Chemistry studies have allowed me to gain practical skills such as manipulation of variables, analysis, interpretation of data and teamwork in a laboratory setting, physical chemistry has also allowed me to improve my mathematical skills. Psychology is a subject I have found to be stimulating and has given me a deeper understanding of the human mind and complex mental processes. I also did an EPQ titled ‘To what extent has the use of robotics enhanced the survival rate of medical procedures?’ from which I gained skills in planning, researching, and presenting, this research task has allowed me to improve and develop decision making and critical thinking skills.

During the summer I participated in the National Citizen Service programme which enhanced my communication, interpersonal and team building abilities which are valuable skills to have in both academic and social contexts. I have contributed to my community by volunteering in charity events and taking part in sponsored walks which I enjoy as it allows to have a positive impact on others. During my five years in high school I participated in an Islamic theology course, this required dedication and time management and shows that I can balance extra-curricular activities and my academic studies.

I am motivated to deepen my knowledge of the human body, its anatomy, physiology and genetics. While being aware of the challenges I may face I am enthusiastic to demonstrate competence, drive and commitment whilst studying this continuously evolving topic of biomedical sciences.

Why this example works — strengths and ways to improve

This archived statement shows genuine interest in biomedical science and a sensible A level base, but it relies heavily on listing activities and generic skills. The GP shadowing, ecology project and EPQ are promising evidence, yet each is summarised rather than explored. Deeper reflection on specific ideas, findings or questions would make your motivation far more convincing and personal.

Subject motivation

My fascination in science arises from its uncertainty

This is a potentially interesting angle, but you never say which uncertainty or unanswered question draws you. Phrases like love for biology and curiosity of the human anatomy stay general. Naming one disease mechanism, topic or puzzle you actually want to understand would make your motivation distinctive rather than assumed.

Academic preparation

using statistical tests to analyse my findings

Your ecology project shows real research process from planning to analysis, which is good preparation. However, you do not say what you investigated, which test or what you found. Chemistry and Psychology are described through skill lists rather than content you engaged with, so the depth of preparation is asserted more than demonstrated.

Evidence and reflection

I recognised the importance of the research and lab work

This is the most relevant reflection, linking clinical observation to laboratory science. Yet it stays abstract: what case, test or diagnosis prompted this realisation? Your EPQ on robotics and survival rates could also offer a conclusion or surprising finding, but you only list skills gained, which misses the chance to show thinking.

Relevant experience

worked one to one with children to improve literacy

The GP week is clearly relevant; the primary school placement is less so and its teaching insight is not connected to biomedicine. Volunteering, NCS and the theology course show commitment, but they occupy significant space. Trimming these and expanding the GP or EPQ material would better serve your application.

Credibility and voice

improve teamwork, leadership and responsibility skills

Stacked skill claims like this appear repeatedly (communication, teamwork, decision making, critical thinking) and blur your voice. Readers believe skills more when shown in a moment. Small accuracy slips also matter in a science statement: intercellular where intracellular may be meant, and enhanced the survival rate of medical procedures is awkward phrasing.

Structure and format

My interest in science can be seen by my A level subjects.

The order is logical, moving from motivation to experience, studies and extracurriculars, then a conclusion. However, the second paragraph mixes motivation, work experience and skills, and the ending repeats the opening without adding insight. Some run-on sentences and missing words, such as allows to have, reduce clarity.

What you’ve done well

The ecology project shows you have handled an investigation from planning through statistical analysis.
Your EPQ title addresses a genuine medical question and offers strong potential material for discussion.
The GP shadowing creates a sensible link between clinical practice and the research focus of biomedical science.

How this draft could improve

Choose one or two experiences, such as the EPQ or ecology project, and explain a specific finding, difficulty or question they raised for you.
Replace generic skill lists with brief concrete moments, and cut or condense less relevant activities to make room.
Proofread for precision, checking terms like intercellular and fixing run-on sentences and missing words.

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