Oncology personal statement

Reading time: 3 minutes
Price: Free download
Published: 19th December 2019
Word count: 769 words
File format: Text

With the ability to encounter all situations with a critical mindset, I believe that I hold the attitude and potential to pursue a career in the medical field. Medicine is a degree that intrigues me as it is highly dynamic and bridges the gap between science and society.

My knowledge and passion of a career in medicine has developed through attending numerous ‘medicine in action’ lectures at Kings College London, delivered by doctors from various specialties. Attending these lectures has informed me about the career demands and allowed me to understand the benefits and difficulties of life as a doctor. E.g. an aspect of medicine that, I learnt, will be a challenge as a doctor, is the idea of mortality, and having to deal with death more than average. This concept of mortality is further emphasised in the book ‘Being Mortal’ by Atul Gawande where he, as a doctor, writes about his experience on ‘how unready’ he was to help those suffering from mortality. A lot of courage and competence is required to discuss the concept of death to patients and their close relations. This reality intrigued me and has allowed me to develop a deeper understanding of the limitations of medicine but also reminded me of the purpose of a medical profession.

This thought on mortality sparked my interest in oncology [—insert]

In April 2018, my shadowing placement in the psychiatry department at St Thomas’ Hospital taught me the significance of building a rapport with patients through effective communication skills. Using this skill, I believe, allows each and every patient to be treated as individuals, respecting their dignity. I strived to effectively put this into practice by volunteering at Kings College Hospital. This has allowed me to interact with a wider and new demographic group of people. As a volunteer, I have had the opportunity to support the recovery of patients who have suffered from strokes. This experience has increased my awareness of the careful attention to detail and specifics that is required to ensure that the best quality of care is provided to each and every patient. Regularly volunteering each week has further prepared me for the long term commitment to medicine. These experiences have allowed me to understand the roles of each specific member of the multidisciplinary team better and encounter situations that will only occur in a hospital.

My placement at Step By Step nursery, looking after 3 months – 5 year old children, led me to develop patience and leadership skills. By encouraging social manners and respect for others and undertaking reading, writing, drawing and other activities, I have developed my ability to effectively lead a group of people. Leadership skills are essential as a doctor as they are the ultimate decision makers and hold a greater responsibility of leading the multidisciplinary team. [—insert]

Whilst volunteering for the Royal Society of Medicine, my participation in the OSCE training day provided me with invaluable experience and insight into medicine. By acting as a patient for the doctors’ practical examinations, not only have I learnt some knowledge and skills required as a doctor but have also obtained insight into what to expect by studying medicine. Understanding what decisions are available to be made when a minor is gillick competent or not is something that I learnt which further reminded me of the medical ethics – gillick competence

My employment in writing articles for a tuition company (Ummah Tutors) has increased my initiative, independence and creativity skills. Having written many articles My involvement in the Compass Project (a project that empowers women) has increased my awareness of the limitations of this society and has taught me the significance of effectively making use of criticisms to empower ourselves as individuals. This project led me to believe that I am community orientated which encouraged me to complete a Level 3 Emergency First aid course so that I can be of use to aid members of my community when required. Furthermore, my interest in learning new languages such as Arabic and French, in addition to Bengali and English, essentially means that I will be able to communicate with a wide range of patients.

I am an aspiring doctor and would like to put my ability to offer care and empathy into practice. I am aware that medicine requires long term commitment however, being adaptable and resilient, I believe that I have the passion, skills and ability to excel in this course. I very much value time and believe that with hardship comes ease. My dedication to volunteering in a hospital and the other skills I have obtained, equips me to follow through with this degree.

4.9.2018

Why this example works — strengths and ways to improve

This is clearly an unfinished draft for undergraduate medicine, with two placeholder inserts, a sentence that breaks off mid-thought and a misleading oncology title. Your reflection on mortality via lectures and Gawande is the strongest thread. The other paragraphs mostly list experiences and name skills rather than showing what specifically happened or changed in your thinking.

Subject motivation

This thought on mortality sparked my interest in oncology [---insert]

Your most promising motivational thread, mortality and medicine's limits, stops exactly where it should develop. The opening relies on a generic claim of a critical mindset and a broad phrase about bridging science and society. Finishing this oncology link with a concrete moment or question would give your motivation a personal centre.

Academic preparation

Understanding what decisions are available to be made when a minor is gillick competent

Gillick competence and Being Mortal show some engagement beyond school, but the ethics sentence trails off unfinished. There is no mention of science study, independent reading on oncology, or how coursework prepares you. Even one precise example of what you learned about competence would strengthen this.

Evidence and reflection

how unready

Quoting Gawande and connecting it to courage in discussing death is genuine reflection. Elsewhere, phrases like increased my awareness of the careful attention to detail claim learning without showing an incident. Describe one stroke-patient interaction or one psychiatry observation and what it changed in your understanding.

Relevant experience

support the recovery of patients who have suffered from strokes

Weekly hospital volunteering, psychiatry shadowing, OSCE role-play and nursery work are solid, varied evidence. The writing does not say what support you actually gave. The leadership claim from nursery work stretches into doctors being ultimate decision makers, which feels forced and overstates hierarchy within multidisciplinary teams.

Credibility and voice

I very much value time and believe that with hardship comes ease.

This line hints at a personal outlook but is left unexplained, so it reads as a proverb rather than insight. Repeated each and every patient and stacked skill nouns flatten your voice. Your honest uncertainty about death is more convincing than assertions of passion, skills and ability.

Structure and format

Having written many articles My involvement in the Compass Project

Fragments, inserts and a merged sentence make the draft hard to assess. The E.g. abbreviation and the dated sign-off are informal. The paragraph order works, but the languages and first-aid points are tacked on. The conclusion repeats claims rather than drawing your threads together.

What you’ve done well

The mortality discussion, linking lectures with Being Mortal, shows real thought about medicine's limits and the emotional demands on doctors.
Regular stroke-ward volunteering and OSCE role-play give you credible, sustained exposure to clinical settings.

How this draft could improve

Complete the placeholders and broken sentences, especially the oncology link, and make sure the title reflects a medicine application.
Replace skill labels such as initiative, independence and creativity with one concrete incident per experience and what you concluded from it.
Cut or tighten weaker items, such as article writing and the leadership claim, so space goes to your strongest clinical reflections.

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