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- Published: 28th June 2019
- Word count: 710 words
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For almost a decade I have been studying at school and increasing my knowledge in a wide range of subjects. But about three years ago I suddenly realised that I have never been as happy as when I am solving problems and tricky cases. That is why, I have decided to focus on learning exact sciences such as Mathematics, Information Technologies and Statistics. I enjoy understanding how everything works, due to this, I have begun to master Programming and I was beyond happy when my programs started to work smoothly and well. I have comprehended that the right formulation of the problem is the core of it and the essential step on the way to finding the solution. However, right now the vast amount of my knowledge is theoretical so I would love to apply it in handling practical issues, industrial purposes being one example. I have an idea about how hard is it to learn but I love a challenge and I always look forward to improving my skills. I am interested in studying Math and Business studies because there is a wide spectrum of areas in our life where this knowledge could be applied. For example, it is really useful to know some economical and mathematical rules in order to maintain and run family or personal finances, to understand when it is perfect time to buy a house or a car, to spend money «correctly».
Having read many books and watched movies about business, the stock market and finance, I tend to think that there are lots of possibilities to use and apply the theoretical and practical skills which I have gained from the field of maths, programming and date analysis when I was studying un Russia. Mainly because of this desire, I have been helping my father with analysing in his job by simplifying the information in the table via Excel programming language. Such work has helped me develop my researching skills and problem solving techniques.
I have a number of different hobbies including tennis and music which have helped me improve team working and social skills. However, photography is my biggest passion after Maths and it has taught me to see everything from different angles and notice less obvious things. For instance, not so many people will find a tiny little ladybug in the bushes as stunning and amazing as the sunset in the mountains. But the old proverb says that beauty is in the details and it is really important to look for them. In addition, sports like tennis, skiing and windsurfing have trained me working in any type of conditions or under a lot of pressure, dealing well with unexpected issuers. Taking part in many after school activities, I have learned how to use my time correctly, working to deadlines, being organised and motivating or supporting people in hard times.
Talking about my English ability, I cannot forget to mention my time spent in language summer camps in the UK. Studying Math and Economics on the International Foundation Programme at the Warwick University I have had a opportunity to learn British culture and traditions as well as teaching standards, to feel myself being the part of university exciting life and culture as well as improve my knowledge much further and deeper in each subject.
Those are some of the major reasons why I have chosen the UK and the University of Warwick as the way to achieve my goals. Besides, it cannot be denied that England is one of the original places where the capitalistic economic system was established. Furthermore, the University of Warwick was recommended to me by one of my family friends, who is currently studying there. More than that, it has a huge amount of positive references on the Internet and has a good place in the league table among European universities. In addition, it is located in the middle of the UK with comfortable weather conditions which I like and which is similar to my motherland. On top of that, I am really glad that there is an opportunity to spend time on my hobbies and find facilities to keep fit on-campus. I expected to gain experiences and knowledge, skills and friends from all over the world.
Sxxxxxx Mxxxxx
26 October 2016
Why this example works — strengths and ways to improve
This archived statement shows genuine enjoyment of problem-solving and one useful practical example, the Excel work for your father. It is weakened by generic skill claims, little concrete academic detail, a thin link to business beyond personal finance, and a long final section about Warwick that relies on reputation, weather and facilities rather than course fit.
Subject motivation
I have never been as happy as when I am solving problems
Your enjoyment of problem-solving is a sincere starting point, but the business side rests mainly on household finance examples like buying a house or car. Explaining which mathematical or business questions intrigue you, and why the combination matters, would make the motivation convincing rather than general.
Academic preparation
Studying Math and Economics on the International Foundation Programme at the Warwick University
The Foundation Programme is strong, relevant preparation, yet you say only that it deepened your knowledge. Naming topics studied, a module you found demanding, or a method you learned would show readiness far better. Programming is mentioned but no language, project or problem is described.
Evidence and reflection
the right formulation of the problem is the core of it
This is your best reflective insight, showing you have thought about how problems are solved. It needs anchoring to a specific example, perhaps from programming or the Excel task, so the reader sees how you reached it. Elsewhere reflection becomes generic claims about research and teamwork.
Relevant experience
helping my father with analysing in his job by simplifying the information
An ordinary task like this can be excellent evidence, but it is described in one sentence. What data was it, what did you build, what went wrong, and what did it teach you about business decisions? Note Excel is not strictly a programming language.
Credibility and voice
has a good place in the league table among European universities
Your voice is warm and honest, but reasons such as league tables, online reviews, weather and capitalism's origins in England sound unconsidered. Hobby paragraphs list skills like working under pressure without evidence. Typos such as 'date analysis', 'un Russia' and 'issuers' also undermine precision.
Structure and format
Those are some of the major reasons why I have chosen the UK
The opening and middle follow a logical arc, but the final two paragraphs give disproportionate space to the UK and Warwick, ending on facilities and friends rather than your subject. Transitions like 'More than that' and 'On top of that' stack points instead of developing them.
What you’ve done well
- Genuine, personal enthusiasm for problem-solving and seeing programs work.
- The Excel work for your father is a practical, relatable example linking analysis to business.
- The Warwick Foundation Programme offers directly relevant preparation in Maths and Economics.
How this draft could improve
- Expand the Excel task and a programming or Foundation topic into concrete examples showing what you did and learned.
- Replace general reasons for Warwick and the UK with specific course content or teaching that fits your interests.
- Cut hobby skill lists to one reflected example, and proofread carefully for typos and grammar.
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